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What do elves learn in school?
The Elf-abet!
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at 2008-08-05 |
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Why is it so cold at Christmas?
It's in Decembrrrrr.
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at 2008-08-05 |
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If athletes get athlete's foot, then what do astronauts get?
Missile toe.
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at 2008-08-05 |
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It was Christmas and the judge was in a merry mood as he asked the prisoner, "What are you charged with?"
"Doing my Christmas shopping early," replied the defendant.
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at 2008-08-05 |
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Santa: "So little girl, what would you like for Christmas?"
Girl: "I want a Barbie Doll and a G.I. Joe."
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at 2008-05-13 |
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You do know what would have happened if it had been three wise WOMEN instead of men, don't you? They would have asked for directions, arrived on time, helped deliver the baby, cleaned the stable, made a casserole and brought disposable diapers as gifts!
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at 2008-05-13 |
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A man, wearing only a bathrobe, bends over the Christmas tree to pick up a present.
His young son looks up the robe and asks, "Hey Dad! Who's getting the bagpipes?"
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at 2008-05-13 |
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When does Christmas come before Thanksgiving?
In the dictionary!
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at 2008-04-17 |
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What nationality is Santa Claus?
North Polish.
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at 2008-04-17 |
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Who brings the Christmas presents to police stations?
Santa Clues.
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at 2008-04-17 |
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What's the most popular wine at Christmas?
"I don't like sprouts!"
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at 2008-04-17 |
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What's red and white and falls down the chimney?
Santa Klutz!
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at 2008-04-17 |
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The three stages of life:
1) You believe in Santa Claus
2) You don't believe in Santa Claus
3) You are Santa Claus
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at 2008-04-17 |
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What do you get if you deep fry Santa Claus?
Crisp Cringle.
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at 2008-04-17 |
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Did you hear about the family who owned an English pointer and an Irish setter?
The dogs get together at Christmas time and have pointsetters.
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at 2008-04-17 |
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Why do all the other reindeer have brown noses?
Because they cant stop as quickly as Rudolph!
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at 2008-04-17 |
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Why was Santa's little helper depressed?
Because he had low elf esteem.
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at 2008-04-17 |
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What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
Snowflakes.
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at 2008-04-17 |
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What is the Christmas message in these letters: ABCDEFGHIJKMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ?
No "L" (Noel).
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at 2008-04-17 |
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I was so poor, that if I didn't wake up with a boner on Christmas morning, I'd have had nothing to play with.
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at 2008-04-17 |
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